When in Doubt, Put It Off: 6 Ways to Procrastinate Like a Genius
Turning Delay Tactics into Productivity Hacks—No, Really
Ah, so you think you’re a procrastinator? Please, you’re not lazy—you’re just taking your time, like a fine brisket. Life’s a marathon, not a sprint, and you’re the guy stopping for a snack every half-mile. But don’t worry, I’ve got a few tricks to turn that avoidance into an asset. Sit down, relax—this’ll take five minutes, maybe ten if I start rambling.
Step 1: Structured Procrastination – How to Avoid What You Should Be Doing by Doing What You Could Be Doing
Listen, if you’re going to procrastinate anyway, you might as well get something useful out of it. When you’re avoiding one dreadful task, you often end up doing something less dreadful—like cleaning the kitchen or reorganizing your email inbox. Congratulations, you’ve just discovered structured procrastination—the fine art of avoiding one thing by doing another.
How to pull it off:
Make a list with the worst task on top—like calling your mother to explain why you’re still single.
By avoiding that, you’ll accidentally find yourself doing other useful things.
Example: Can’t face writing that report? Suddenly, organizing your closet by color seems like a brilliant idea.
Why it works: You’re still getting things done, just not the things you’re supposed to be doing. It’s like dodging one relative at a wedding by talking to another—still counts as socializing!
As my Bubbe used to say: “Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow—especially if it’s unpleasant?”
Step 2: The Five-Minute Rule – Tricking Your Brain Into Starting
Your brain is a little like your cousin Barry—it won’t lift a finger unless it absolutely has to. The trick? Commit to doing just five minutes of that dreaded task. No pressure, no commitment, just five minutes.
Why it works: Most of the time, once you start, you’ll keep going. It’s like promising yourself you’ll go to the gym “just to stretch” and somehow ending up on the treadmill. Who knew?
As my Bubbe used to say: “Starting is half the battle. The other half is finding where you left your glasses.”
Step 3: Productive Procrastination – Avoid With Purpose
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